bc i have no where else to rant or anyone to rant to ———


i had two best friends and everything was great. i got pregnant and then one of those best friends got pregnant at the same time but maybe two or three weeks behind me but whatever. i felt some typa way JUST bc i needed some time to process that i was pregnant at the same time as a friend. i wasn’t hurt, mad, or anything bad. i just wanted to process it that i’m gonna be going through this with someone. well, long story short we argued. it was over text so everything was taken the wrong way but i felt like my feelings were invalid. she made it seem like it was a planned pact to get pregnant together. it was never MY plan. me getting pregnant was a complete accident and just happened. (with someone i’ve loved for over five yrs tho) well, that argument put a dent in our friendship bc one morning she randomly texted me and said she needed a break from our friendship and i just went with it. she texted me a few day later, we apologized and blah blah blah. but to me our friendship never felt the same after that argument. i felt like i couldn’t be myself anymore and i wasn’t comfortable with that. some things were said in our argument that replayed in my head and i couldn’t get over it. she also said when she wanted to take a break from our friendship that she talked to a few people and they agreed that it was a good idea for us. and knowing me, i assume our other best friend was one of those people and just automatically took her side. sooo again, long story short.. i deleted them both from my social medias. just deleted. but then a few days go by and i find out they BOTH blocked me and one also had her boyfriend block me. i get it. i do. but it frustrates me when others make someone out to be this terrible person when in fact it wasn’t just that one persons fault. i love them both to death but i felt unwanted. i felt unheard. i felt left out. i know i should’ve communicated with them how i felt but i have a gut feeling nothing would ever change. ———

sooo, here i am friendless and going through my first pregnancy alone and only with the father of our baby. i love having him here along for the ride but i sometimes wish i had them around.

everything happens for a reason though.

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Originally posted by sirussly

bengurli:

you know what’s sad when two people are so good together but timings and present situations stop them from being with each other

(via saintlauhrent)